The Rise of the “Wife of” Content: A Curious Shift in Social Media Trends | Disha

Abstract

As social media content evolves, a new trend has emerged: women identifying themselves primarily through their husbands’ professions, such as “police wife,” “army wife,” or “sarkaari wife.” These educated, well-spoken women often create engaging content centered around their daily lives as homemakers, offering tips on managing households and family life. However, their online personas are overwhelmingly shaped by their husbands’ careers. While celebrating homemaking and family life is valuable, this trend raises questions about why a woman’s identity often seems tethered to her spouse’s job. Why isn’t being a homemaker, with all its inherent worth, enough on its own? This article explores the social implications of this phenomenon and questions whether this attachment of identity to a husband’s profession is a conscious choice or a reflection of societal expectations. Ultimately, it invites readers to ponder the evolving dynamics of identity in the digital age.

Keywords Wife identity, Homemaking, Social media trends, Gender roles, Marital identity

Introduction

As I scroll through various social media platforms these days, I’m noticing a new genre of content that seems to be gaining immense popularity. It is about wives who define themselves exclusively by the occupation of their husbands. These women—intelligent, well-educated, and polished—create videos under identities such as “police wife,” “army wife,” or even “sarkaari wife” (wives of government employees). With each scroll, I come across vlogs detailing their daily routines, offering glimpses into their lives as homemakers and caregivers.

What’s ironic however is the fact that these women’s self-proclaimed identities are interwoven with the careers of their husbands.

The content itself is typically lighthearted and engaging. From sharing tips on how to manage the household to offering glimpses into family life, these creators paint a picture of stability and domesticity. Their routines revolve around activities like preparing meals, organizing homes, and balancing the needs of children and spouses—valuable work that deserves recognition. However, I can’t help but notice that their content rarely moves beyond their identity as “wives of.” The woman who may be a teacher, entrepreneur, or an artist in her own right is often subsumed by her husband’s profession.

Who Are These Women?

Many of these women come from good socio-economic backgrounds. They are well-educated, often holding college degrees and having grown up in environments that encouraged their intellectual development. They are polished individuals who are eloquent, and many of them would succeed quite well in their own individual pursuits if they chose to do so. However, their content focuses primarily on their roles within the household, often in the context of being a wife to a man working in government service.

To illustrate, the “police wife” segment will routinely demonstrate how the police wife is able to manage the domestic concerns when the police officer husband comes home after a busy day out in the field. The “army wife” segment will provide insight into how life on a military base looks like, how long wartime deployments of the husband are tolerated, and the general social life of women married to army men. Content can be found of “sarkaari wives” as well who discuss the issues regarding the day to day running of a house in their husband’s absence owing to work obligations.

On the surface, this content is relatable and engaging—daily life with all its routines, challenges, and triumphs. There’s a certain charm in watching someone share how they navigate life, and these women often exhibit warmth, love, and pride in their families. However, the content is not only limited to the house chores and bringing up the children. It is always about being married to someone with a certain prestige and exclusive employment.

The “Wife” Identity Takes Center Stage

One of the things that I find particularly interesting is that these women appear to embrace their roles as wives with such dedication that their husbands’ careers become a central part of their own online personas. The term “wife” is no longer just a relationship status; it is a defining characteristic. And not just any wife, but a “police wife” or an “army wife.” It’s as if the title of the husband’s job becomes an identity badge for these women.

This isn’t to say there’s anything inherently wrong with celebrating the unique aspects of being married to a police officer, army official, or government employee. There are undeniably specific challenges and experiences that come with these roles. Nevertheless, I find it difficult when these women limit their personal identity to the professional identity of their husbands. After all, these women are often homemakers—a role that should carry its own sense of pride and accomplishment. Why does being a homemaker not suffice when it is without the appendage of “police” or “army”?

Celebrating Homemakers: Why Isn’t That Enough?

I have a deep respect for homemakers and their contribution to society. Taking care of a family is not a walk in the park, so to say. It requires time, energy, patience, and love, and the women who choose to dedicate themselves to this role deserve admiration. In fact, there have been increasing discussions around recognizing the unpaid labor of homemakers and even including their contribution in the national GDP. This is a critical step in acknowledging the value that homemakers bring to the economy and society.

However, why is it that this recognition still has to be connected to the professions of their husbands? These women are homemakers, period. Is that not enough of an identity for social media audiences? Is it only when one is a homemaker along with a “wife of” tag that one’s identity is valid?

The identity of these women, from the way they portray themselves on social media, often seems to exist in the shadow of their husbands’ jobs. The issue is not whether these wives are beaming with pride at their husbands, they are, and they should be – the issue is why this fact must always come above their own self-identity. It’s even the way they build their content – calling themselves a “police wife” or “army wife” that makes it come out as such.

Content That Revolves Around Their Husbands

From the kinds of videos that they make, it is easy to discern a pattern. It can be either “a day in the life of a police wife” showing how it is to be a “police wife,” or offering tips on how to manage domestic chores as an “army wife.” It needs to be pointed out, though, that such material is interesting and presented in such a way that the attention of the audience is placed entirely onto the persona of the woman whose husband works within a certain professional sphere. It seems as though their own personal achievements, passions, or talents are secondary to the role they play in supporting their spouse’s career.

Of course, there’s no denying that many of these government jobs—especially police or military—come with unique challenges that require tremendous support from their families. But I wonder: wouldn’t it be more empowering to create content that stands independently of their spouse’s profession? Content that celebrates their role as homemakers or individuals in their own right, without needing to qualify that role with their husband’s job title?

The Need for Reflection

I am not questioning the sincerity or dedication of these women. The way they maintain their households and look after their children makes it apparent what hard work lies behind them. I am, however, more interested in the wider social context that I see growing: why do women’s selves appear to be so folded into their husbands’ careers? In a society that increasingly

values individuality and personal empowerment, why do so many women still find themselves being defined by their marital status—and not just any marital status, but a very specific one tied to the husband’s career?

The lives of homemakers are invaluable, and I am in full support of elevating the importance of their work. But why should their identity be wrapped in the occupation of their spouse? Why can’t they simply be proud homemakers, without the prefix of “police,” “army,” or “sarkaari”?

A Question to Ponder

In a world that strives for equality and personal empowerment, where we’re constantly told to embrace our individuality, it’s worth asking why this trend of identifying as a “wife of” is so prominent on social media. Is it societal pressure, a need for validation, or simply pride in their family’s life? Do women today perceive themselves as someone’s wife by choice or rather than design?

As I continue to scroll through these videos, I can’t help but wonder: Is this trend a reflection of how society still views women’s identities in relation to their husbands, or is it something deeper, something these women themselves are embracing as part of their personal narrative?

(Author: Disha, Ph.D. Scholar & Senior Research Fellow, Dr. K. R. Narayanan Centre for Dalit and Minorities Studies, Jamia Millia Islamia, New Delhi, India)