A Modern Indian Erotic Tale | Sumanta Banerjee

Despite all its fulminations against Muslims and the Moghul rule, the Modi government has adopted one ancient royal Moghul institution - the harem, where the nawabs and aristocrats used to maintain their numerous begums and mistresses. In the Modi government’s harem, among the variety of lovers, the present nawab’s most favourites are the, the Enforcement Directorate (ED), the Central Bureau of Investigation (CBI) and the Election Commission (EC). They are good in bed, catering to all the demands made by their patron, however unnatural and perverse the acts that might be, which they are required to carry out every night. Thus, one of the begums, the Enforcement Directorate, is encouraged to indulge in the pastime of going out and wreak vengeance upon the nawab’s old lovers who had deserted him, and new rivals who are trying to unseat him. She is fond of seducing ex-BJP members and Opposition politicians by stick and carrot gestures - threatening them with the stick of legal persecution, to escape which they can accept the carrot. Acceptance of the carrot requires them to take on the role of eunuch guards to protect the nawab’s harem - as in the days of Moghul rule.

The other begum, the CBI is more aggressive. She is encouraged by her master to invade the homes and offices of his rivals, and with a broomstick in her hands, she thrashes them, puts them inside her cage and then winks back at the nawab informing him how well she had carried out his wishes. The next begum, the Election Commission is however a more sophisticated member of the harem. She dances to the music of EVM, and with a twist of her fingers wipes out all the rivals and opponents of her master.

But not satisfied with their performances, and thirsting for more pleasures, the nawab is stalking another potential bed mate, trying to woo her to join the harem. She goes by the name of the Supreme Court. Now, this character is really a difficult person - unpredictable, sometimes winking invitingly at the nawab, sometimes turning her back from him. At times, she gives a coy smile to the nawab while delivering a judgment that may look like an indictment in the first pages, but in the last page reassures the nawab that he has nothing to be afraid of. Thus, while she wears a frown on her forehead when rebuking the vandals of the Hindu Sangh Parivar for destroying the Babri Masjid in Ayodhya, she switches off her expression to replace it with a grin on her lips when allowing the same vandals to build a Ram Mandir on that site. Some of her children, after leaving the parental home, jumped into the beds in the nawab’s harem and were adopted by the nawab as MPs and chairpersons of prestigious national institutions

By enjoying the freedom of being a coquette in the open market, the Supreme Court won’t like to enter the Nawab’s harem and be a caged begum. She prefers to dance in the open - to different tunes which suit her in order to woo her patrons. She thus reminds us of another character from the Moghul regime - the tawaif, a singer and dancer, who instead of being caged in the harem of the sultans and nawabs, chose an independent life-style, but depended on the patronage of these same rulers who used to invite them to perform at ceremonies hosted by the sultans and nawabs in their palatial auditoria - and later to entertain them in their bedrooms. Some among them, after their retirement from the profession, were rewarded by the nawabs with maintenance by providing them with houses and other benefits. One can detect the continuance of this tradition in the present policy of the government to reward its favourite judges by appointing them after their retirement in lucrative posts like chairmen of commissions and nominating them as members of the Rajya Sabha, the upper house in the Indian Parliament.

Watching these performances, by today’s ruling sultan and the begums and tawaifs which he patronizes in the political scene, we feel that we need today another Vatsayana to capture these new erotic twists and turns that are taking place in modern India, and to update his Kamasutra.